Thursday, January 26, 2012

Own Your Mistakes

Some people had rather hide or deny their own mistakes, instead of owning up to them. They become defensive, offer excuses and try to throw the blame on others, making no effort to righting their wrong or to prove them self credible and respectable.
There are many good reasons that we should own up to our mistakes and correct them, and NO good reasons for trying to hide them, deny them or blame others for them.
Owning up to your own mistakes is the only just and right thing to do. Thinking that your mistakes will not be found out or noticed is another stupid mistake. Thinking your mistakes will be silently forgiven only discredits you and your reputation even more. It is important to own up to your mistakes immediately, demonstrating an effort of fixing it and improving your self to do better.
When you learn to own up to your mistakes it makes you a better person. You cannot not learn from your mistakes if you are to busy trying to hide them, deny them, run from them or try blaming others for them.
No one is perfect and we all make mistakes but how you handle your mistakes screams loudly to the world just what kind of person you truly are. Owning up to, correcting and learning from your mistakes teaches you  honor, strength and resilience.
When we make mistakes and get defensive, when we are caught trying to hide them or deny them, proves we are a lesser person, not very credible and not trustworthy at all. Trying to shift blame to others for your mistakes makes you dishonorable, dishonest and weak.
When you don't try to cover up your mistakes it makes your eyes open up to life's lessons so you may strive to do better the next time around, no matter how small or large.
If you don't own your mistakes and correct them, then they will linger in your life constantly causing more and more damage. Don't let your ego stop you from owning up to and correcting your mistakes. Admitting and correcting your mistakes will bring you freedom from taking responsibility, gives you a sense of peace, will bring you happiness, and will release you so you may move forward.
Trying to hide your mistakes because you are ashamed and embarrassed only makes them worse and doesn't solve the problem. You may think you are hiding your mistakes but you are not, because nothing is truly hidden once the act is done or the word is spoken, it is in the open for all the world to see & hear.

..."the truth shall set you free"...
John 8:32

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

God, Please Help Me...

Please help me…
* to find the strength to get up when I just want to give up.
* to speak up the next time he/she disrespects or abuses me.
* to guard myself from family/friends who challenge my trust, faith,
time and money.
* to be grateful and show up for my job even though I don't enjoy it.
* to be a good provider for myself and my family with less stress
and struggle.
* to resist my addictions (i.e. shoes, food, alcohol, drugs, shopping,
gambling, bad relationships, porn, etc.)
* to say “no” to things that can destroy my life, health and
relationships.
* to discover my special anointed gifts, talents and purpose.
* to be successful in my business and leadership roles.
* to meet the right people who can enrich and better my life.
* to fill my lonely hours with productivity, peace and wholeness.
* to forgive and let go of my pain, bitterness and anger.
* to heal my grieving heart for the ones I have lost and miss so much.
* to stop worrying about my loved ones in trouble, the war, hospital or prison.
* to endure and keep my faith as I wait for my miracle.
* to remember, that spite of it all, I am, too blessed to be stressed.
* to remember that You are the source of supply.
* to be blessed and to be a blessing to others.
* to keep pressing toward my mark of a higher calling.
* to stay in the light to see You more clearly, follow You nearly
and love You more dearly.
by Jewel Diamond Taylor, Minister, Conference Keynotes Speaker, author and
Founder of Women on the Grow

Positive or Negative? Which are You?



ATTITUDES

POSITIVE TRAITS
NEGATIVE TRAITS
accepts authority, loyal, devoted
rebellious, defiant
accepts what's given
ignores, rejects what's given
affectionate
distant, cold, aloof
aspiring, ambitious, motivated
self-satisfied, unmotivated
candid
closed, guarded, secretive
caring
uncaring, unfeeling, callous
change; accepts, embraces
rejects change
cheerful
cheerless, gloomy, sour, grumpy
considerate, thoughtful
inconsiderate, thoughtless
cooperative
uncooperative, unhelpful, combative
courageous
cowering, fearful
courteous
rude, impolite
decisive
indecisive
devoted
uncommitted, uncaring, hostile
determined
indecisive, unsure
does what is necessary, right
does what is convenient
perseveres, endures
relents, gives up
enthusiastic
unenthusiastic, apathetic, indifferent
expansive
kept back, tight, constricting
faith in life
life can't be trusted
faith in oneself
lack of faith in self
faith in others
others can't be relied on or trusted
flexible
inflexible, rigid, unbending, stubborn
forgiving
unforgiving, resentful, spiteful
focused
unfocused, scattered
freedom given to others
authoritarian, controlling
friendly
unfriendly, distant, aloof, hostile
frugal, thrifty
wasteful, spendthrift
generous
stingy, miserly, selfish
goodwill
ill-will, malice, hatred
grateful
ungrateful, unappreciative
hard-working
lazy
honest
dishonest, deceiving, lying
humble
arrogant, conceited, ego-centric
interested
indifferent, uncaring
involved
complacent, indifferent
jealous, not
jealous, envious, covetous
kind
unkind, uncaring, cruel, mean
mature
immature
modest
vain
open-minded, tolerant
narrow, close, small-minded, intolerant
optimistic
pessimistic
perfects
allows imperfection
persistent, sustaining
flagging, fleeting, unsustaining
positive
negative
practical
impractical, not viable
punctual
late, not on time
realistic
impractical
reliable
unreliable, undependable
respectful
disrespectful, rude, impolite
responsibility; takes-
blames others
responsible
unreliable, unreceptive
self-confident
lack of self confidence, insecure
self-directed
directed by externals
self-disciplined
undisciplined, unrestrained, indulgent
self-esteem; high-
self-esteem; confidence - low
self-giving
self-centered
self-reliant
dependent
selfless
selfish
sensitive
insensitive, indifferent
serious
silly, trivial, petty
sincere
insincere, dishonest
social independence
social approval required
sympathetic
unsympathetic, unfeeling
systematic
unsystematic, disorganized, disorderly
takes others point of view
insist on own point of view
thoughtful towards others
thoughtless, inconsiderate, callous
trusting
suspicious, mistrusting
unpretentious
pretentious, affected, ostentatious
unselfish
selfish
willing does, willingness
unwilling, reluctant, recalcitrant
work-oriented
convenience first, lazy


Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Love or Addiction???

Most people wonder and question why abused women stay in an abusive relationship, how they ever got into an abusive relationship, and why they do not stand up for them self and leave. Until you have been in an abusive relationship and understand how the abuser takes control mentally and emotionally, then you will never understand. There are more women in prison because of man addiction/abuse than any other crimes committed.
Hopefully this will help you in understanding the process and reason why women stay or keep going back to their abuser/ex. So maybe it will help you to understand and help someone you know in an abusive relationship.
Abuse doesn't start with the beatings, the abuser starts by getting control mentally and emotionally at the start of the relationship. An abuser is usually a coward when standing alone and is scared of anyone they do not have mental and emotional control over. An abuser doesn't like or associate with anyone that they cannot manipulate and intimidate. They can not handle it when they are not the center of attention and do not have full control of their surroundings and everyone around them. They are usually blowing their own horn, bragging about everything they have done, can do or own, but in reality they usually are lying, don't have a pot to piss in, and can't pour piss out of a boot with the instruction on the bottom. An abuser has NO respect for women, themselves or anyone. They are usually liars, arrogant, rude, obnoxious, belittling or verbally threatening anyone that intimidates them (which is very easy to do), manipulative and thinks the whole world owes them and should bow down to them. Now that you have an idea of the abuser, now lets look at the victim/woman.
An abuser couldn't get control of a woman mentally and emotionally if there wasn't this chemical that is produced in the human body called "Oxytocin". Oxytocin is a chemical produced by the body which produces the emotions in us of trust, love and so forth, this so called "warm and fuzzy feeling" when we think we love someone. Oxytocin is a neurochemical that creates these warm and fuzzy feelings/emotions in us that we associate with our emotional bonds to other people.
When people talk about their feelings of love for someone, they are describing the feelings/emotions produced by oxytocin. Oxytocin is highly addictive, even more addictive than heroin. Oxytocin doesn't have that much to do with romantic love, it dominates the feelings we have for love and a long-term relationship. Basically, the woman gets addicted to the oxytocin and not the so called love for the abuser/ex, so the longer the woman is with the abuser the stronger the bond becomes, because of the intensity of the oxytocin addiction.
If or when the woman leaves the abuser/ex, just like any other addictive chemical, there will be about 3 days wait until the woman starts experiencing oxytocin withdrawal symptoms. So, in reality, the woman is having withdrawals from the oxytocin, making her think she is painfully missing her abuser/ex ,making her think she truly loves him and is bonded to him, unaware that it is the oxytocin she is missing and craving, not her abuser/ex.  So once the woman is away from her abuser, about 3 days later she will start having oxytocin withdrawal symptoms, making her forget all the bad and the abuse, while only remembering what little good there was in the relationship, making her think she is painfully missing her abuser/ex.
The oxytocin withdrawals are more severe than the withdrawals of heroin addiction. The damaging fact is that women are taught all their lives that these oxytocin chemical induced feelings are feelings of love. So the oxytocin withdrawal symptoms, her feeling and her beliefs push her to go back to her abuser/ex, unaware that she is experiencing oxytocin withdrawals and not true love for her abuser/ex.
Abused men go through the same oxytocin process, but the effects of the oxytocin in women are far more significantly stronger than in men. The female harmone, estrogen, multiplies the effects of oxytocin in women by about 10 times more than in men.
Hopefully this will give you a different way of looking at abused women, even though abused women refuse to admit they are abused and they refuse to leave their abuser/ex.
Abused women are addicted to  abusive relationships (abuser/ex) because of their unknown addiction to "Oxytocin",  NOT LOVE!!!

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Masquerades...

People seem to think of Satan as a red-eyed hideous evil being with horns, long pointed tail, carrying a pitchfork. Nothing could be farther from the truth. If Satan came to us as this red-eyed hideous evil being, we would be so terrified that we would run straight to God's arms.
Satan comes to steal, kill and destroy, and he is the master of lies and manipulation, to keep us from serving God. The greater the plan God has for our life, the harder Satan will try to deceive us and to destroy us.
Satan will use anything and anyone he can to accomplish his goal, of getting us to serve & follow him and not God. Satan can even come in the form of humans: false Jesus, false prophets, false preachers, etc., so what makes us think he can't infiltrate our lives using people to destroy us and God's plan for us? We as humans are so blind to Satan and his disguises.
Satan can use parents, children, spouses/mates, someone we care for and/or love, friends, false preachers/teachers, money, computers, TVs, phones, games, hobbies, drugs, alcohol, pornography... the list can go on and on.
Satan's masquerades to disguise himself into something that will attract us and capture us in his snares of destruction. His main goal is to send something or someone into our lives to take us away from the plan God has for us and to stop us from serving God, so we will be another one of his trophies in hell.
Not all parents are bad parents but so many are in today's society. They do not raise their children to serve God and not Satan; to have respect for others and themselves; to stay away from the drugs, alcohol and the wrong people; to work for what they need and want instead of using, manipulating and stealing as a means of getting; they do not teach their children ethics and morals; etc... This is only leading their children right into Satan's traps of destruction and hell. When a parent chooses drugs, alcohol or even a person over their child, then they are leaving that child defenseless and wide open for Satan to step in and take control of that child and the child's future, because the parent isn't there to protect the child from the damage of rejection.
Parents do not look at their children as a tool for Satan but we need to open our eyes. Children are a blessing from God and they can be a blessing but they also can be used as a tool for Satan. When children give us grief; are defiant and rebellious; in trouble/causing trouble; using and manipulating us; draining us dry mentally, emotionally, physically and financially; and distracting us from keeping our focus on God and serving God, then yes, Satan is using this child as one of his tools of destruction. That is why it is so important to speak and pray blessings over our children, and to raise them to serve God and not Satan.
A spouse/mate can be a one way ticket straight to hell if we are not careful in choosing our spouse/mate. Good and evil cannot connect with a good outcome because the evil will do everything in its power to destroy any and all good in it's path. We tend to think our spouse/mate loves us and will not do anything to hurt or destroy us because they love us. Question: Is that love true Godly love or is it just another word you want to hear, for you to be drawn into Satan's trap? When we think someone loves us we have a tendency to close our eyes to the truth, real-life reality, the true nature of this person, their self-centered agenda's, their lifestyle choices and their faults, and the fact they could be nothing but a tool for Satan. Everyone is guilty of this at some point in time, even myself, but this is from wanting to be loved, blinded by a human love/lust and being human.
If you choose a spouse/mate that doesn't honestly and openly serve the one and only God (be careful of what god they serve) then you best run as fast as you can away from this person because they are there as a tool for Satan. Whether you have a spouse/mate that is as good as they come or not, if they do not respect you and themselves, and serving God above everything else, then they will probably lead you to hell with them. They can be abusive or good as gold but if they do not care if you go to hell or not then that person doesn't truly love you or love God.
This also goes for family, friends, co-workers, acquaintances, church people, strangers, etc... Close your ears to the deceitful lies of Satan and watch the actions of people: are they of Satan or of God? Actions speak louder than words. If people in your life is not concerned enough to lead you to heaven, then you can bank on the fact that they are a tool of Satan, sent there to destroy God's plan for you, to stop you from following God and lead you straight into hell with them!!!
Satan will even send people into your life that you despise/hate, if he thinks you will spend your time and energy on despising/hating this person, instead of focusing on God and serving God.
Stop and think of all the masquerades and disguises of Satan.
How much time do we spend gossiping on the phone; watching TV; on the computer or playing games; time spent on our hobbies; thinking about such things as money, drugs, alcohol, pornography, sex, etc.............?
Think about how much wasted time we spend involved in Satan's masquerades of human pleasures, instead of using some of that time to serve God and insuring that we, and everyone we know and meet, go to heaven and not hell. I am not saying to give up everyone and everything but we do need to open our eyes to the real truth and to the masks that Satan wears to steal, kill and destroy us and God's plan and future for us!!!

"And no wonder, for Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light"
2nd Corinthians 11:14

Saturday, January 7, 2012

Road Map of Life

The longest sermon in the Bible that Jesus gave is "the Sermon on the Mount", the road map of life, "the Beatitudes" (Matt. 5:3-12). The Beatitudes was just part of the Sermon on the Mount.
The word "Beatitude" means "Blessed". The Beatitudes should guide us, point us in the right direction, teach us and show us the values that Jesus wants us to have and live by.
I, myself, fall way short of this and disappointed in myself for this short coming and for allowing myself to fall into the world of evil and human mistakes!!! We seem to have sort of a wrong thinking of what the Beatitudes really mean, myself included. Hopefully this will help us all to understand them better and help us live by them.
1. Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven.
    God blesses those who are poor in spirit and realizes their need for Him, for the Kingdom of Heaven is given to them. The poor means "poor in spirit", not financially poor. Poor in Spirit means that we realize we fall short of what God wants us to be and that we all are unworthy of God's Grace. Jesus says that only the poor in spirit will enter into the Heaven because they confess, turn from their sins and turn to Jesus. The poor in spirit knows without God we can't be forgiven and made a new person.
2. Blessed are they who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
    God blesses those who mourn, for He will comfort them. This doesn't mean those who mourn the death of someone, but the person who becomes poor in spirit and repents. It means to realize we are sinners and realizing just how much our sins hurts us, others and God. Until we realize this, repent and receive the Holy Spirit we cannot truly mourn over our sins. When we mourn over our sins, only then can God comfort us and make us a new person.
3. Blessed are the meek, for they shall possess the earth.
    God blesses those who are gentle and lowly, for they will inherit the whole earth. Jesus says, who are humble and meek will inherit the earth. These words do NOT mean weak as we think of them. These words mean strong, powerful, trained and disciplined so that we can serve God and be used by God.
4. Blessed are they who hunger and thirst for justice, for they shall be satisfied.
    God blesses those who hunger and thirst for Him and His justice, for they will be satisfied by God. Those who want justice is to want righteousness and right living for ourselves and others. You will find love, honour and justice in searching for righteousness. God will make sure we are fully satisfied once we do our best to want what is right for ourselves and others
5. Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.
    God blesses those who are merciful. Mercy is love for those who need support and help, especially in forgiveness. God shows us mercy everyday and expects us to show mercy to others everyday. We must forgive and show mercy because if we don't then God cannot forgive us and show us mercy. To show mercy we have to live a life of love. There is no mercy without love.
6. Blessed are the pure of heart, for they shall see God.
    God blesses those whose heart is pure. To have a pure heart is to become holy and the only way to do that is to keep your heart full of God's words. If you keep your heart full of God's words, then there is no room for sin and evil. If you live by God's words/instructions then your heart will be pure. When we are pure in heart we will see God in our everyday life here on earth and when we get to Heaven.
7. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.
    God blesses those who work for peace. Making peace doesn't mean trying to keep everyone happy or saying yes to everyone and everything. A peacemaker builds their character on truth and righteousness, and are at peace with God. Peacemakers plant seeds of peace and God's word, and reaps the harvest of goodness by being known as a child of God.
8. Blessed are they who suffer persecution for justice sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
    God blesses those who are persecuted because they live for Him. If we live for God, we will suffer because today's society is all for evil and will persecute you for serving God. They will laugh at you, ridicule you, mock you, make nasty comments and sometimes physically abuse you, just as they did Jesus. The world and Satan hates Jesus and will hate you for following Him. If you are persecuted, then be happy because that is proof you are following Jesus and you will be received into Heaven, where there is no more suffering.

"the road map of life from Jesus to all of us"

Matthew 18:3 "Truly, I say to you, unless you turn and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven."
Matthew 18:4
"Therefore whoever humbles himself as this little child, will be the greatest in the kingdom of heaven."